I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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