You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
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