is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
