I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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