What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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