going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize