i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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