i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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