Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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