I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
accomplished twins. life is a go
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
There's always time for handjobs
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
