After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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