Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Watching her eat just hurts me
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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