some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
