From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
