She is in my trunk
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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