absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
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