He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
