I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
