Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
