You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
