I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
