Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
