I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
