im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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