i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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