we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
