She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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