I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
