Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
