i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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