peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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