Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
he just fucked me for my cheese.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
