idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
