Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
