sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
