No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
