I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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