Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
