dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
