You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize