Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize