too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
