it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Randomize