My balls are so social today.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
