is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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