Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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