There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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