Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
