my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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