Grow some girl-balls and come out already
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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